rubyredstained: (Impossible Girl)
Serenity Dawson ([personal profile] rubyredstained) wrote2009-10-03 07:21 pm

Friends Only

To be totally and completely open and sharing, there is a sexy, pink-haired goddess in my bed right now.

Last night was good.

Oh dear GOD I hope this isn't because of my mothers' ritual turned sexual encounter...

Screened

[identity profile] in-spectre-mors.livejournal.com 2009-10-04 10:18 am (UTC)(link)
I know you're lovely and I probably don't have to say this, but please do be careful with her. I don't know if Kat would have said anything, but she lost her wife Alessa recently. Just... please be gentle, to the best extent you can. Not that I want to put a damper on anything. I really am glad you're having a good time together. I think this could be good for her, and I'm glad she's with someone I trust.

Re: Screened

[identity profile] rubyredstained.livejournal.com 2009-10-04 10:28 am (UTC)(link)
What?! Oh shit, I really cocked up there. No, she didn't say anything. She didn't seem sad either.

Fuck, poor Kat.

Thanks for telling me, Spectre. I'll be careful, I promise.

You trust me?

Re: Screened

[identity profile] in-spectre-mors.livejournal.com 2009-10-04 10:45 am (UTC)(link)
No, no, you didn't cock up. You weren't to know. To my eyes, you only would have cocked up if you'd treated her badly, and I can see that's not the case.

Flynn has always spoken highly of you, and Godric even more so. I trust them both as good judges of character, even if I didn't trust my own sense of people, which I do. Everything tells me you are indeed eminently trustworthy. That makes it somewhat of a relief to me, actually, to know that Kat is engaging with you in a lively way.

Of course, you're welcome for the info. Thank you for being good to her, Serenity. I know your promise is worth the world.

Re: Screened

[identity profile] rubyredstained.livejournal.com 2009-10-04 10:52 am (UTC)(link)
I think she's wonderful, though now I'm worried. But of course I didn't treat her badly. I just wish I'd known.

Godric is my platonic husband. Thank you for your trust, Spectre. I don't take things like that lightly. I know trust isn't easy to give.

Of course.

Re: Screened

[identity profile] in-spectre-mors.livejournal.com 2009-10-04 11:05 am (UTC)(link)
I'm worried about her too; though to be fair, that was true anyway. Kat will deal in her own way, but of course, I don't want to see you hurt, either. I'm glad to have made you aware of the whole situation.

You and Godric are darling. And my dear, you're very welcome.

Screened

[identity profile] rubyredstained.livejournal.com 2009-10-04 11:09 am (UTC)(link)
I'm kind of unhurtable in this way as long as she doesn't hold me down and carve her name into my thigh or beat me up because I spend time with other people. She...won't do that, right?

Re: Screened

[identity profile] in-spectre-mors.livejournal.com 2009-10-04 11:34 am (UTC)(link)
Kat may be fiery, but I'm quite sure you don't have to worry about anything like that. She has a wonderful heart, and it just pains me that that heart has taken such a beating.

Re: Screened

[identity profile] rubyredstained.livejournal.com 2009-10-04 11:37 am (UTC)(link)
It is horrible. She's still sleeping. Sleeping is good.

Incidentally, that thing I just told you I have only told about four or five people in the world, and I have no idea why I gave up that secret so soon after getting to know you. Probably because you're trusting me so I should trust you back, I guess?

Re: Screened

[identity profile] in-spectre-mors.livejournal.com 2009-10-04 12:01 pm (UTC)(link)
Sleeping is good; I'm glad she's found some measure of peace enough for that.

Then I very much appreciate the trust, Serenity, and shall always endeavour to be worthy of it. Your secrets entrusted to me, I shall keep as my very own. And now that I do know, if it's ever something you want to talk about, I'll be here for you. You can trust in that, too.

Re: Screened

[identity profile] rubyredstained.livejournal.com 2009-10-04 12:05 pm (UTC)(link)
Me too.

It's not something I have a burning need to tell people. But now you'll know why my thigh says 'Jason' if you happen to catch a glimpse. I sure as hell didn't put it there.

Re: Screened

[identity profile] in-spectre-mors.livejournal.com 2009-10-04 12:17 pm (UTC)(link)
That's truly awful, Serenity. I do hope this Jason was brought to justice for what he did to you?

Screened

[identity profile] rubyredstained.livejournal.com 2009-10-04 12:41 pm (UTC)(link)
No. No, I didn't tell anyone until I told Ben about a month ago. No one who saw it ever asked.

Re: Screened

[identity profile] in-spectre-mors.livejournal.com 2009-10-04 12:52 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, goodness. I'm so sorry. I truly wish people cared more. If it's okay to ask... how long ago did it happen?

Re: Screened

[identity profile] rubyredstained.livejournal.com 2009-10-04 12:58 pm (UTC)(link)
I do too, Spectre.

It was about five years ago. I was with him for three years. I ended it. I think my one fear in this whole...being really quite visible thing, is that he'll come out of the woodwork. He's not dangerous, at least not to anyone he's not in a room alone with. I just don't want to be anywhere near that. I already have enough trouble believing I have any worth at all.

Re: Screened

[identity profile] in-spectre-mors.livejournal.com 2009-10-04 01:05 pm (UTC)(link)
I can certainly understand that fear. I had the same feeling about my father, though we've since come to a reconciliation.

It may not be much, but I should introduce you to two friends of ours who are providing extra security on the US run, Fable and Hamish. They're good people, if a little militant in character, and they know how to look after themselves and others. I'm sure they'll keep off all trouble-makers and intruders, and respond readily to any call for help. That being said, we in the band ourselves are also there to look out for you, and after all we've been through, have picked up a few handy tricks.

As to your self-worth, I can only hope that that's something we can help build in you. I know you'll do great things with us, but more than that, I know you'll be surrounded by love. It's something you'll have to take your own time with; but it's also a journey several of us will understand, myself included. My struggle with my sexuality caused me to behave in ways that contributed to my own self-loathing for a long time, and it was only once I met Peter and Ash that all that started to turn around.

Re: Screened

[identity profile] rubyredstained.livejournal.com 2009-10-04 01:11 pm (UTC)(link)
Well good!

Yeah, that I believe. It sounds like a good idea. I have a photo of him too. Several actually. Thanks, Spectre.

I really think I joined the right band...

Re: Screened

[identity profile] in-spectre-mors.livejournal.com 2009-10-04 01:15 pm (UTC)(link)
I wasn't sure whether to suggest a photo, but now that you mention it, I'm sure it would help. They, and we, have sharp eyes. Though I highly doubt you'll need to worry about him in the States, at any rate. And of course, Serenity, you are more than welcome.

Well, I'm very glad to hear you think so! I certainly hope we prove you right.